According to my mother it’s “rude and ignorant” to be uncomfortable around babies.
Babies are rude and ignorant.
dont fuck babies
my mom told me that in high school she use to get boyfriends at the beginning of February so they had enough time to get her a valentines day gift and then break up with them the day after and just keep the gift and one day she told her parents about it and they made her keep her boyfriend at least until the end of February and so she did and that boy is now my dad
why the fuck is every nursery rhyme about people dying
- the london bridge is falling down and probably crushing pedestrians
- ring around the rosie pockets full of posie ashes ashes we all get obliterated by the black plague
- it’s raining it’s pouring the old man is snoring he bumped his head and fucking died
and fucking died
humpty dumpty committed suicide
jack fell down a hill and cracked his skull
A BABY FELL OUT A TREE
i try not to sound like an asshole but it’s really hard because i am an asshole
my mom texted me a facebook screenshot of this today and said ‘sounds like something you would say LOL’ like u have no idea mom
nah son, i ain’t got no snapchat. I’m old-fashioned. just fax it to me. fax me the nudes.
i can only handle so much socializing until i get tired and start getting irritated towards everyone and want to go home and sleep or lock myself in my room and go on the computer